INVENTED : INFLATION EQUATION

Once again, everybody is crying out loud about inflation which is rising inversely in proportion to skirt length of Mallika Sherawat.I did a close study on this deviation previous night and have come up with a formula to calculate Inflation vs skirt length ratio.

IR = [Skirt Length of Mallika(in inches)/NP] + ^g -^s (keeping other factors constant)
Where
IR = Inflation rate
NP = No of parties involved in coalition government
^g = Rate of decrease in US aid to india
^s = Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest

Variable 1 : Skirt length of Mallika

Although looks difficult but that's a pretty simple equation which can be used in all the scenarios.Now, how I deduced that equation with the kind of intelligence i have, can be an interesting point.Inflation has risen rapidly since 2002-03 and if we take a close look at the Indian market condition at that time it is evident that it is the period when iconic Mallika sherawat entered into Indian film industry.But how mallika is related to Inflation. Here are the few factors which caused Inflation due to mallika's entrance.

1) Excessive use of Mobile phones : As her sensational performances kept on coming, people started gossiping more and more about her, hundreds and thousands of SMSes flooded during that time. she became an household name in lesser time than Nirma detergent power.People started wishing even birthdays on mallika's messages like "Ishwar kare Hardin Aapki khushiyan Petrol Ke bhav ki badhe, aur aapke gum Mallika Sherawat ke Kapdon ki tarah ghaten.". Airtel has calmed that this SMS has hit their network 15,000,00 times on Vajpayee's birthday, more than the amount she got for her first movie.She imposed a huge usage of mobile phones and pre-paid cards which market was not ready to handle it

2) Increase in sale of 'pan-bidi-chai' : Even in the small cities, the post work gathering sessions started getting longer and longer as people started discussing more and more about her mesmerizing performances in 'Murder' and sipping tea and puffing more bidi and sutta, Nathu pan wala shortly launched a PBC combo for rupees 12. Demand was so huge that PBS industry was unable to meet the requirements of their mouth watering products and all PBS walas increased their prices.
As the people started spending more and more on phones and PBS, their monthly savings decreased and they started to cut their expenditure on clothes which lead towards not so common short skirts(although claimed as a fashion but it was more due to money crunch) which further caused garment industry to smuggle more material from adjacent Bangladesh.

There are many more factors which can be i thought upon and i am convinced that main factor which lead to a sudden rise in inflation was indeed Mallika.

Variable b : Stability of Indian Government

This is again a tricky but simple point.More and more parties are involved in a coalition government, less are the chances of price to get increased for a particular thing in respective states. As our government lies on such a small stone that even a small party like Janta dal Union (which doesn't have enough funds to buy Ram Bilas Paswan a good blade) can make them sneeze so whenever finance minister tries to increase some revenues by rising prices, the party from the state consuming most part of it baffles and it has to be revoked by the government. Maharashtra and Delhi parties never allow price hike on fuel, Southern parties never allows price hike on cosmetics, Bengalis never allows price hike on Cigarettes and Bihar never let proposal of new educational institution pass.Govt has to put everything out of their pocket.The quota to a state is decided by number of MPs which are there supporting from that state.

Variable 3 : Rate of decrease in American aid to india

This factor needs no explanation as everybody knows how much independent we are, our stock markets reveals that regularly.

Variable 4 : Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest

Everyone scold Shiv sena for their rude attitude but nobody can deny that when shiv sena was in power, inflation was very much under control. Shiv sainiks used to enter every place wherever there was any sort of western activities like dancing, singing, cricket matches, award ceremonies or pravachans. They never allowed people to involve into Mallika oriented things and kept the country on the same old track for as in medieval India. Whenever they start protesting against anything, ladies stops wearing western clothes(like short skirts which as specified, is a big factor for inflation) and turn back to regular Salwar kurtas.They never allow people to get addicted to anything and keep market on track. I wonder how did Balasaheb foresaw that thing fifteen years ago. Now he wears thick glasses.

Combining all the factors an keeping them at respective places, this equation can be proved perfect, more perfect than Netwon's laws of motion.

Interesting theory, isn't it :):):)