Friday, September 26, 2008

Nothing but new

So, moments ago I thought of putting something after an exile of more than a month. First thing came to my mind was 'TZP's nomination for Oscar' but fell flat in between, it was boring as hell. Then i thought of writing on latest economic crisis, bomb blasts in india, EPL first month review, ICL snatch up of Bangla players, Big boss season 2 blah blah blah but i couldn't write anything. Seems like everything i thought is so much in news that everybody is tired of that including my own thoughts. I am really unable to think of anything new. So many things going on in life, i really need two full days to put everything to an end which are bugging me from last few weeks. So here i am writing about 'nothing'.

Its a well known fact that i am the only one reading this blog with a handful of others who keep checking this to tatter me over the various discussions but i loved the last smack i got few days back over my MAY post 'INFLATION EQUATION'. I think that's the only response i got over that post so finally my 1 hour effort didn't go in vain, there are still some people who like craps...way to go.

So, i logged in but i had nothing to write about and i couldn't see my same posts over and over again and suddenly i thought of giving it a new look instead of a new blog. Probably its an unglamorous attempt of my dream to have my own website one day where i can put every little shit of this world but looking at my lazometer it is in the best interest of everybody to use the features Blogger is providing. I am looking to make it more dynamic with some new features and will keep on updating with few good articles which i liked along with my favorite videos over you tube, quotes, soccer news and offffcourse movies.

Hope it will get me a couple of more frequent hits, just a lame attempt but enough to keep me and this blog survive for few more days.

Monday, August 18, 2008

ABHINAV BINDRA BLOG

Next three days after creating the HISTORY. Its something from Abhinav Bindra's Blog...

In search for some normalcy..... Thursday, August 14, 2008 – 6:39 PM
I won the gold and my world has exploded. I like to keep to my self with my familiar comforts. While the attention is flattering, at the same time there is this constant glare of scrutiny which I can really do without. I am so looking forward to being home in my familiar comfort zone. I have flirted with the idea of donning a disguise and running away for a month till the euphoria passes and life gets to normal. Unfortunately that’s not an option just as of now. But hey, it’s a fun fantasy.I am happy to know that air guns are running off the shelves across India. From the many will come the few who can be groomed to go all the way. However, I would like to caution all potential shooters out there that firearms are not toys. Prudence is essential in their use. Please be careful not to cause hurt to any living creature.

the end to my Olympics.... Wednesday, August 13, 2008 – 9:20 AM
So it is now over and the time for me to return home has arrived. I know my life is not goign to be even close to the same upon return but it is something i am going to have to embrace and actually enjoy which i am at this moment finding way more daunting than shooting...The truth is i am scared because it is not somethign i am familiar it but i would like to take this opportunity to thank all my fans and all my well wishers who have rooted for me and all those who have left such kind comments on the blog page as well.i have finished reading all the comments but i am hoping to catch up once i am home and the media hype dies down.I also want to wish the other participating the best of luck...although i am not going to be around seeing them at the village i will be definitely rooting for them from back home. I am hoping we cna come back with some more medals because we have all worked so hard and really deserve some more.

Monkey off my back!!!!!!!! Tuesday, August 12, 2008 – 5:32 PM
More than the joy, elation, euphoria my strongest feeling is a release from a thousand kilo weight that has been daunting me for the last 12 years.I am really really happy that i could deliver for my country and all the indian athletes who are trying and working just as hard as me.I have a strong feeling that we are going to win more medals at these games and it is going to be great to be able to watch my compatriots without any thoughts like my training and event off my mind.I really hope this is the beginning of a journey of many more medals for India and glory for our great country and its people.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

I feel like being in a new territory

Abhinav winning THE olympic gold in SHOOTING
India winning the AFC Cup in SOCCER
Lee-Hesh close to an olympic medal in TENNIS
Saina Nehwal thrashing Top seeded players in BADMINTON
Delhi hosting COMMONWEALTH games
Vijay Mallya bought a FORMULA ONE team
Anil Ambani looking to buy NEWCASTLE UNITED
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The IMMORTALS are unable to play a rookie spinner in Sri Lanka..
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Something is wrong here

Monday, August 4, 2008

HOTEL TEAM INDIA

In a packed Ashoka hotel, selection was taking place
Here i am Dhepack Tourasia, with cameraman shailesh
Up ahead in the distance, i saw a shimmering light
I couldn't stop my laugh, she was sharad pawar's wife
There she puked in the doorway, I heard Kiran More's yell
And i was thinking to myself, Ganguly must be beating chappell
Then she announced the captain, it was Shinde
There were media men in the corridor, I heard them say..

Welcome to the hotel team india
Such a crooky place
Such a crooky place
Plenty of bookies in the hotel team india
Any time of year, you can find it here

He got the hamstring injury, but he is not sad
He got the Airtel ad, so he is glad
How he plays in the matches, is doesn't matter
At the end of year, he gets 'Arjun Award' letter
So I called up the captain, 'please bring me a victoree
He said, 'we haven't had that spirit here since nineteen eighty three'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night, Just to hear them say...

I will gift you a flat in lokhandwala
Just for losing a match
Just for losing a match
Plenty of rooms in the flat of lokhandwala
And one maruti esteem, to all your team

Black label on the table, the pink champagne on ice,
Gavaskar said 'I am the consultant here, i will only give advice'
And in the wrestling arena, they gathered to fight,
Harbhajan slapped Sreesanth once again, Chawla got pissed because of his height
Last thing I remember, I was Running for the phone,
I had to call the police but there was only an engage tone,
'relax' said the Dalmiya, this is the latest requirement,
Mr Pawar has done it a lot of time, in the parliament !!

And then they all laughed at me and sang along the way,
Kumble was biting his nails in the corner,Just to hear them say,

Come for the Indian team selection
Fifty lakhs a year
Fifty lakhs a year
And we assure you a place in the team,
for Zimbabwe tour, for Zimbabwe tour

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

GOLDEN TURKEY

All around the time we see some self proclaimed movie critics imposing their reviews on innocent junta. I really don't understand how true they are as i have never seen any Yash Chopra movie, howsoever ridiculous it is, getting less than 6/10 other than JBJ aka jhoom barabar jhoom. In all the theaters, watchmen had a hard time and they named it JBJ aka Jaago Bete Jaago.If there are any 'Indian Golden Turkey' awards, i think there are a whole bunch of movies which can make it.Have a look at those chosen ones which have got rating in between 1 to 3 (highest number of votes) in my list.

Rating 1 - The 'EYE FLU' movies - These kind of movies are really hazardous to your eyes and brain, highly recommended to stay away from them all the time. They are so irritating that even a promo of these movies can give you black eye.Though i haven't watched any of them but i wont even dare to watch even if i am offered a free full body massage by Stacy Kiebler.

The top nominations in this category are :

1) Pyaare mohan - I am not anti-Vivek and Fardeen but Tom, Dick and Harry has given me so much pleasure that i am in no mood to watch another set of sick jokes on handicapped and crippled.Only watch if you are too buzzed to understand anything.

2) Laga Chunari mein daag - Despite of all the gaga over Rani's acting,you need to watch this piece of crap by YashRaj camp to acknowledge her talent..she has already proved herself in Black, Yuva and Saathiya.Only watch if you are enjoying a porn channel and your younger brother rushes around looking for his basketball.

3) Rocky 'The Rebel' - Even if the Zayed aura alone was not enough, here you have 'Zayed the rebel'. I am sure it will be a laugh riot watching him ACTING as angry young man and a lover boy with the same twisted face but i will prefer 'Jo bole so nihaal' or 'Big Brother'if i need some headache.

The 'VENOMOUS EYE FLU' actor - The winner in this category is none other than Uday Chopra.He has been unsuccessfully launched more than 1st ever Russian satellite to moon.The 'DEADLY EYE FLU' director - Who else? Deepak Tijori it is. I dont believe he is still making films after OOPs, Tom DIck and Harry and Khamoosh..


Rating 2 - The 'Maggi Noodles' movies - These movies are so well crafted that even 2 minutes of them can turn you into a killer and you wish to hit the person right behind you to get some payback of your money back. It is highly advisable to change the channel as soon as you get glimpse of any of them.

1) I see You - Please please please change it to I 'will never' see you. Arjun Rampal's home production looks as bad as structure of other production houses who dared to make movie with Arjun Rampal.Even the first look of this movie can make you feel sick and probably you need a week of YOGA classes to stabilize yourself.

2) Asambhav - What to say ? The name says it all. I watched it for 20 minutes and i got nightmares in the night where Arjun Rampal 'the Hulk' was sent to rescue Indian President. Come on...its Indian president, one guy and that too Arjun Rampal. Even the choice was indigestible..i would have loved to watch Sunny Paaji doing Gadar in Switzerland.

3) Gayab - How can there be any list without the mention of 'tFussssar Kapoot'. I still cant distinguish between his Smile [Mujhe Kucch Kehna Hai], Anger[Khakee], bewilderment [Golmaal] and Comedy [Dhol]. He is Its better he is 'Gayab' in the whole movie but even the other characters are so irritating that you need a whole lot of sleeping pills after that.

The 'MAGGIE NODDLE' actor - No prizes for guesses, its a tie between Arjun Rampal and TFusssar Kapoot.The 'MAGGIE NOODLE' director - It took me little longer to remember but no doubt its Sunny's favorite Guddu Dhanoa. Not enough..just check out few of his classics in recent years[BigBrother,Kismat,Jaal:TheTrap,Hawa,Aflatoon,Ziddi,TuChorMainSipahi,Gundaraj,Elaan] ...moreover he is the only guy which i couldn't find on wikipedia in my entire search history. A typical 'MAGGI' stuff.


Rating 3 - The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' movies - Just like the ad where a child cries 'Papaji, petrol khatam hi nahi hota', they are so much 'paisa vasool' that they keep on going and going and going, and the time your are out of cinema hall half of your hairs are not on your head because of scratching and half has turned white.Highly recommended for those who like all those
stupid Saas-Bahu sagas.

1) Umrao Jaan - Wow...if you have missed the entire Mughal history, this is the movie to watch out for..it is equivalent to 30 documentaries on entire Akbar's parliament. You can take a sleep for 4 hours and wake up and can still find the scene at the same place..the only classy thing about this movie is Anu Malik's music...its too classy.Ranbaxy got its music rights and are promoting free with their sleeping pills.

2) Ek Chotti si love story - I think it got some terrible mistake in editing, almost one scene is repeated 7-8 times in the entire movie and only other scene is 'the end'.Its like star gazing, you see same things again and again in the desire to find something and end up with a freaky DECCAN AIRWAYS craft which you misunderstand as some UFO. It can be used as a puzzle
in quiz competitions...identify the difference between these two pictures.The only difference is zoom of the telescope which that teenager use to spy on Manisha's body double.

3) Yaadein - Its not a movie actually, its a music album with one song 'Baatein bhool jaati hai, yaadein yaad aati hai' with a three hour mournful music video. Its better for me to leave it the way it is.

The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' actor - Its none other than Aftab Shivdasani. this guy is still working like Maruti Suzuki ESTEEM without even a single decent hit in 10 years.I didnt know there are so many homosexuals in India.The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' director - Its s.Ramanathan, the guy who made movie 'Zamannat' (1997-2007). It is said that it took around 10 years to release. Reliable sources has reported that Ramanathan used to go to Diamond mines in Africa, work
for 1 year, come back when he get enough budget for the movie and then start shooting again. It reminds you of the days when Big B had black beard, anupam Kher had some last crop of hairs and Ayub Khan had Vicco advertisement.

SPECIAL RECOGNITION - VAADA - Here you have both Arjun Rampal and Zayed Khan..gem of a movie.

This list can never end and wait for the time we come back with next category of awards. Indian cinema is full of masterpieces.

The Chosen one

A sigh, a whisper took my breath away
she almost knocked me off, crossing my way
her glittering eyes, left me ice cold
an incomplete story, still unfold
I was mesmerized, it looked evident
today, i escaped another accident !!

Monday, June 23, 2008

BELIEF - HOPE - TRUTH

Each time I question the presence of the superpower which is driving this whole world, i always find myself at the intersection of a two way street, one way going towards the illuminated path which is said to be the source of an immortal energy in this universe and another towards a deep dark endless road where i don't know what exists.Its always tough to decide which way to go because the long endless road is an interesting prospect with a hope to discover something new, something which has more concrete presence than just a 'BELIEF'.I call this illuminated road as 'BELIEF' and darkened road as 'HOPE'.Its more difficult to decide as whenever i wake up in the morning, i wake up with a new HOPE, a hope to achieve what i was dreaming every yest er night but that hope is more like a mirage because of the 'BELIEF' that dreams are never real.

Its easier to follow BELIEF as it is well illuminated and most of the time i follow this path when i am in hurry but it is monotonous, there is no turn and you feel dizzy...a feeling of boredom. Everything is so much pre-defined and concrete.People always sitting nearby ocean staring the huge sun over them,relaxing, there is no fear, no hurry. I reach my destination with no difficulty,its all well decorated but something is missing. HOPE is dark but full of fun, I avoid to go there usually but whenever i go, i feel refreshed i see the people making a stair to sun, some kids trying to walk on the water and clouds drinking tea at a restaurant.And after few miles, there is a desert, its nothing out there but some bubbles flying in the air, i touched one and a butterfly came out of it. There is always something in those bubbles but few of them have thrones which tear your hands, face and body each time you touch them. Sometimes, i reach less injured but sometimes i am badly hurt whenever i reach my home.I sleep but it hurts, i am not able to sleep properly.

The BELIEF is enclosed in a box with thick walls where everything is so pre-defined and its easier to go that way, HOPE is tough but it makes you stronger and surge a new energy inside you.History is the witness that whenever HOPE has overpowered BELIEF, it has changed this world. There was a belief that nobody can take out East India Company from India, Gandhi-Bose started with a HOPe and turned the table.It was said to be impossible to cross the Pacific and believed there is a monster on the other side, now its just a matter of few hours.

HOPE has got its existence from the BELIEF, not the other way round and HOPE is just to make BELIEF more meaningful, whatever way we follow there will always be a point where our BELIEF will merge to our HOPE and at that point we will get a new way towards TRUTH.