In a packed Ashoka hotel, selection was taking place
Here i am Dhepack Tourasia, with cameraman shailesh
Up ahead in the distance, i saw a shimmering light
I couldn't stop my laugh, she was sharad pawar's wife
There she puked in the doorway, I heard Kiran More's yell
And i was thinking to myself, Ganguly must be beating chappell
Then she announced the captain, it was Shinde
There were media men in the corridor, I heard them say..
Welcome to the hotel team india
Such a crooky place
Such a crooky place
Plenty of bookies in the hotel team india
Any time of year, you can find it here
He got the hamstring injury, but he is not sad
He got the Airtel ad, so he is glad
How he plays in the matches, is doesn't matter
At the end of year, he gets 'Arjun Award' letter
So I called up the captain, 'please bring me a victoree
He said, 'we haven't had that spirit here since nineteen eighty three'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night, Just to hear them say...
I will gift you a flat in lokhandwala
Just for losing a match
Just for losing a match
Plenty of rooms in the flat of lokhandwala
And one maruti esteem, to all your team
Black label on the table, the pink champagne on ice,
Gavaskar said 'I am the consultant here, i will only give advice'
And in the wrestling arena, they gathered to fight,
Harbhajan slapped Sreesanth once again, Chawla got pissed because of his height
Last thing I remember, I was Running for the phone,
I had to call the police but there was only an engage tone,
'relax' said the Dalmiya, this is the latest requirement,
Mr Pawar has done it a lot of time, in the parliament !!
And then they all laughed at me and sang along the way,
Kumble was biting his nails in the corner,Just to hear them say,
Come for the Indian team selection
Fifty lakhs a year
Fifty lakhs a year
And we assure you a place in the team,
for Zimbabwe tour, for Zimbabwe tour
Monday, August 4, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
GOLDEN TURKEY
All around the time we see some self proclaimed movie critics imposing their reviews on innocent junta. I really don't understand how true they are as i have never seen any Yash Chopra movie, howsoever ridiculous it is, getting less than 6/10 other than JBJ aka jhoom barabar jhoom. In all the theaters, watchmen had a hard time and they named it JBJ aka Jaago Bete Jaago.If there are any 'Indian Golden Turkey' awards, i think there are a whole bunch of movies which can make it.Have a look at those chosen ones which have got rating in between 1 to 3 (highest number of votes) in my list.
Rating 1 - The 'EYE FLU' movies - These kind of movies are really hazardous to your eyes and brain, highly recommended to stay away from them all the time. They are so irritating that even a promo of these movies can give you black eye.Though i haven't watched any of them but i wont even dare to watch even if i am offered a free full body massage by Stacy Kiebler.
The top nominations in this category are :
1) Pyaare mohan - I am not anti-Vivek and Fardeen but Tom, Dick and Harry has given me so much pleasure that i am in no mood to watch another set of sick jokes on handicapped and crippled.Only watch if you are too buzzed to understand anything.
2) Laga Chunari mein daag - Despite of all the gaga over Rani's acting,you need to watch this piece of crap by YashRaj camp to acknowledge her talent..she has already proved herself in Black, Yuva and Saathiya.Only watch if you are enjoying a porn channel and your younger brother rushes around looking for his basketball.
3) Rocky 'The Rebel' - Even if the Zayed aura alone was not enough, here you have 'Zayed the rebel'. I am sure it will be a laugh riot watching him ACTING as angry young man and a lover boy with the same twisted face but i will prefer 'Jo bole so nihaal' or 'Big Brother'if i need some headache.
The 'VENOMOUS EYE FLU' actor - The winner in this category is none other than Uday Chopra.He has been unsuccessfully launched more than 1st ever Russian satellite to moon.The 'DEADLY EYE FLU' director - Who else? Deepak Tijori it is. I dont believe he is still making films after OOPs, Tom DIck and Harry and Khamoosh..
Rating 2 - The 'Maggi Noodles' movies - These movies are so well crafted that even 2 minutes of them can turn you into a killer and you wish to hit the person right behind you to get some payback of your money back. It is highly advisable to change the channel as soon as you get glimpse of any of them.
1) I see You - Please please please change it to I 'will never' see you. Arjun Rampal's home production looks as bad as structure of other production houses who dared to make movie with Arjun Rampal.Even the first look of this movie can make you feel sick and probably you need a week of YOGA classes to stabilize yourself.
2) Asambhav - What to say ? The name says it all. I watched it for 20 minutes and i got nightmares in the night where Arjun Rampal 'the Hulk' was sent to rescue Indian President. Come on...its Indian president, one guy and that too Arjun Rampal. Even the choice was indigestible..i would have loved to watch Sunny Paaji doing Gadar in Switzerland.
3) Gayab - How can there be any list without the mention of 'tFussssar Kapoot'. I still cant distinguish between his Smile [Mujhe Kucch Kehna Hai], Anger[Khakee], bewilderment [Golmaal] and Comedy [Dhol]. He is Its better he is 'Gayab' in the whole movie but even the other characters are so irritating that you need a whole lot of sleeping pills after that.
The 'MAGGIE NODDLE' actor - No prizes for guesses, its a tie between Arjun Rampal and TFusssar Kapoot.The 'MAGGIE NOODLE' director - It took me little longer to remember but no doubt its Sunny's favorite Guddu Dhanoa. Not enough..just check out few of his classics in recent years[BigBrother,Kismat,Jaal:TheTrap,Hawa,Aflatoon,Ziddi,TuChorMainSipahi,Gundaraj,Elaan] ...moreover he is the only guy which i couldn't find on wikipedia in my entire search history. A typical 'MAGGI' stuff.
Rating 3 - The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' movies - Just like the ad where a child cries 'Papaji, petrol khatam hi nahi hota', they are so much 'paisa vasool' that they keep on going and going and going, and the time your are out of cinema hall half of your hairs are not on your head because of scratching and half has turned white.Highly recommended for those who like all those
stupid Saas-Bahu sagas.
1) Umrao Jaan - Wow...if you have missed the entire Mughal history, this is the movie to watch out for..it is equivalent to 30 documentaries on entire Akbar's parliament. You can take a sleep for 4 hours and wake up and can still find the scene at the same place..the only classy thing about this movie is Anu Malik's music...its too classy.Ranbaxy got its music rights and are promoting free with their sleeping pills.
2) Ek Chotti si love story - I think it got some terrible mistake in editing, almost one scene is repeated 7-8 times in the entire movie and only other scene is 'the end'.Its like star gazing, you see same things again and again in the desire to find something and end up with a freaky DECCAN AIRWAYS craft which you misunderstand as some UFO. It can be used as a puzzle
in quiz competitions...identify the difference between these two pictures.The only difference is zoom of the telescope which that teenager use to spy on Manisha's body double.
3) Yaadein - Its not a movie actually, its a music album with one song 'Baatein bhool jaati hai, yaadein yaad aati hai' with a three hour mournful music video. Its better for me to leave it the way it is.
The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' actor - Its none other than Aftab Shivdasani. this guy is still working like Maruti Suzuki ESTEEM without even a single decent hit in 10 years.I didnt know there are so many homosexuals in India.The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' director - Its s.Ramanathan, the guy who made movie 'Zamannat' (1997-2007). It is said that it took around 10 years to release. Reliable sources has reported that Ramanathan used to go to Diamond mines in Africa, work
for 1 year, come back when he get enough budget for the movie and then start shooting again. It reminds you of the days when Big B had black beard, anupam Kher had some last crop of hairs and Ayub Khan had Vicco advertisement.
SPECIAL RECOGNITION - VAADA - Here you have both Arjun Rampal and Zayed Khan..gem of a movie.
This list can never end and wait for the time we come back with next category of awards. Indian cinema is full of masterpieces.
Rating 1 - The 'EYE FLU' movies - These kind of movies are really hazardous to your eyes and brain, highly recommended to stay away from them all the time. They are so irritating that even a promo of these movies can give you black eye.Though i haven't watched any of them but i wont even dare to watch even if i am offered a free full body massage by Stacy Kiebler.
The top nominations in this category are :
1) Pyaare mohan - I am not anti-Vivek and Fardeen but Tom, Dick and Harry has given me so much pleasure that i am in no mood to watch another set of sick jokes on handicapped and crippled.Only watch if you are too buzzed to understand anything.
2) Laga Chunari mein daag - Despite of all the gaga over Rani's acting,you need to watch this piece of crap by YashRaj camp to acknowledge her talent..she has already proved herself in Black, Yuva and Saathiya.Only watch if you are enjoying a porn channel and your younger brother rushes around looking for his basketball.
3) Rocky 'The Rebel' - Even if the Zayed aura alone was not enough, here you have 'Zayed the rebel'. I am sure it will be a laugh riot watching him ACTING as angry young man and a lover boy with the same twisted face but i will prefer 'Jo bole so nihaal' or 'Big Brother'if i need some headache.
The 'VENOMOUS EYE FLU' actor - The winner in this category is none other than Uday Chopra.He has been unsuccessfully launched more than 1st ever Russian satellite to moon.The 'DEADLY EYE FLU' director - Who else? Deepak Tijori it is. I dont believe he is still making films after OOPs, Tom DIck and Harry and Khamoosh..
Rating 2 - The 'Maggi Noodles' movies - These movies are so well crafted that even 2 minutes of them can turn you into a killer and you wish to hit the person right behind you to get some payback of your money back. It is highly advisable to change the channel as soon as you get glimpse of any of them.
1) I see You - Please please please change it to I 'will never' see you. Arjun Rampal's home production looks as bad as structure of other production houses who dared to make movie with Arjun Rampal.Even the first look of this movie can make you feel sick and probably you need a week of YOGA classes to stabilize yourself.
2) Asambhav - What to say ? The name says it all. I watched it for 20 minutes and i got nightmares in the night where Arjun Rampal 'the Hulk' was sent to rescue Indian President. Come on...its Indian president, one guy and that too Arjun Rampal. Even the choice was indigestible..i would have loved to watch Sunny Paaji doing Gadar in Switzerland.
3) Gayab - How can there be any list without the mention of 'tFussssar Kapoot'. I still cant distinguish between his Smile [Mujhe Kucch Kehna Hai], Anger[Khakee], bewilderment [Golmaal] and Comedy [Dhol]. He is Its better he is 'Gayab' in the whole movie but even the other characters are so irritating that you need a whole lot of sleeping pills after that.
The 'MAGGIE NODDLE' actor - No prizes for guesses, its a tie between Arjun Rampal and TFusssar Kapoot.The 'MAGGIE NOODLE' director - It took me little longer to remember but no doubt its Sunny's favorite Guddu Dhanoa. Not enough..just check out few of his classics in recent years[BigBrother,Kismat,Jaal:TheTrap,Hawa,Aflatoon,Ziddi,TuChorMainSipahi,Gundaraj,Elaan] ...moreover he is the only guy which i couldn't find on wikipedia in my entire search history. A typical 'MAGGI' stuff.
Rating 3 - The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' movies - Just like the ad where a child cries 'Papaji, petrol khatam hi nahi hota', they are so much 'paisa vasool' that they keep on going and going and going, and the time your are out of cinema hall half of your hairs are not on your head because of scratching and half has turned white.Highly recommended for those who like all those
stupid Saas-Bahu sagas.
1) Umrao Jaan - Wow...if you have missed the entire Mughal history, this is the movie to watch out for..it is equivalent to 30 documentaries on entire Akbar's parliament. You can take a sleep for 4 hours and wake up and can still find the scene at the same place..the only classy thing about this movie is Anu Malik's music...its too classy.Ranbaxy got its music rights and are promoting free with their sleeping pills.
2) Ek Chotti si love story - I think it got some terrible mistake in editing, almost one scene is repeated 7-8 times in the entire movie and only other scene is 'the end'.Its like star gazing, you see same things again and again in the desire to find something and end up with a freaky DECCAN AIRWAYS craft which you misunderstand as some UFO. It can be used as a puzzle
in quiz competitions...identify the difference between these two pictures.The only difference is zoom of the telescope which that teenager use to spy on Manisha's body double.
3) Yaadein - Its not a movie actually, its a music album with one song 'Baatein bhool jaati hai, yaadein yaad aati hai' with a three hour mournful music video. Its better for me to leave it the way it is.
The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' actor - Its none other than Aftab Shivdasani. this guy is still working like Maruti Suzuki ESTEEM without even a single decent hit in 10 years.I didnt know there are so many homosexuals in India.The 'MARUTI SUZUKI' director - Its s.Ramanathan, the guy who made movie 'Zamannat' (1997-2007). It is said that it took around 10 years to release. Reliable sources has reported that Ramanathan used to go to Diamond mines in Africa, work
for 1 year, come back when he get enough budget for the movie and then start shooting again. It reminds you of the days when Big B had black beard, anupam Kher had some last crop of hairs and Ayub Khan had Vicco advertisement.
SPECIAL RECOGNITION - VAADA - Here you have both Arjun Rampal and Zayed Khan..gem of a movie.
This list can never end and wait for the time we come back with next category of awards. Indian cinema is full of masterpieces.
The Chosen one
A sigh, a whisper took my breath away
she almost knocked me off, crossing my way
her glittering eyes, left me ice cold
an incomplete story, still unfold
I was mesmerized, it looked evident
today, i escaped another accident !!
she almost knocked me off, crossing my way
her glittering eyes, left me ice cold
an incomplete story, still unfold
I was mesmerized, it looked evident
today, i escaped another accident !!
Monday, June 23, 2008
BELIEF - HOPE - TRUTH
Each time I question the presence of the superpower which is driving this whole world, i always find myself at the intersection of a two way street, one way going towards the illuminated path which is said to be the source of an immortal energy in this universe and another towards a deep dark endless road where i don't know what exists.Its always tough to decide which way to go because the long endless road is an interesting prospect with a hope to discover something new, something which has more concrete presence than just a 'BELIEF'.I call this illuminated road as 'BELIEF' and darkened road as 'HOPE'.Its more difficult to decide as whenever i wake up in the morning, i wake up with a new HOPE, a hope to achieve what i was dreaming every yest er night but that hope is more like a mirage because of the 'BELIEF' that dreams are never real.
Its easier to follow BELIEF as it is well illuminated and most of the time i follow this path when i am in hurry but it is monotonous, there is no turn and you feel dizzy...a feeling of boredom. Everything is so much pre-defined and concrete.People always sitting nearby ocean staring the huge sun over them,relaxing, there is no fear, no hurry. I reach my destination with no difficulty,its all well decorated but something is missing. HOPE is dark but full of fun, I avoid to go there usually but whenever i go, i feel refreshed i see the people making a stair to sun, some kids trying to walk on the water and clouds drinking tea at a restaurant.And after few miles, there is a desert, its nothing out there but some bubbles flying in the air, i touched one and a butterfly came out of it. There is always something in those bubbles but few of them have thrones which tear your hands, face and body each time you touch them. Sometimes, i reach less injured but sometimes i am badly hurt whenever i reach my home.I sleep but it hurts, i am not able to sleep properly.
The BELIEF is enclosed in a box with thick walls where everything is so pre-defined and its easier to go that way, HOPE is tough but it makes you stronger and surge a new energy inside you.History is the witness that whenever HOPE has overpowered BELIEF, it has changed this world. There was a belief that nobody can take out East India Company from India, Gandhi-Bose started with a HOPe and turned the table.It was said to be impossible to cross the Pacific and believed there is a monster on the other side, now its just a matter of few hours.
HOPE has got its existence from the BELIEF, not the other way round and HOPE is just to make BELIEF more meaningful, whatever way we follow there will always be a point where our BELIEF will merge to our HOPE and at that point we will get a new way towards TRUTH.
Its easier to follow BELIEF as it is well illuminated and most of the time i follow this path when i am in hurry but it is monotonous, there is no turn and you feel dizzy...a feeling of boredom. Everything is so much pre-defined and concrete.People always sitting nearby ocean staring the huge sun over them,relaxing, there is no fear, no hurry. I reach my destination with no difficulty,its all well decorated but something is missing. HOPE is dark but full of fun, I avoid to go there usually but whenever i go, i feel refreshed i see the people making a stair to sun, some kids trying to walk on the water and clouds drinking tea at a restaurant.And after few miles, there is a desert, its nothing out there but some bubbles flying in the air, i touched one and a butterfly came out of it. There is always something in those bubbles but few of them have thrones which tear your hands, face and body each time you touch them. Sometimes, i reach less injured but sometimes i am badly hurt whenever i reach my home.I sleep but it hurts, i am not able to sleep properly.
The BELIEF is enclosed in a box with thick walls where everything is so pre-defined and its easier to go that way, HOPE is tough but it makes you stronger and surge a new energy inside you.History is the witness that whenever HOPE has overpowered BELIEF, it has changed this world. There was a belief that nobody can take out East India Company from India, Gandhi-Bose started with a HOPe and turned the table.It was said to be impossible to cross the Pacific and believed there is a monster on the other side, now its just a matter of few hours.
HOPE has got its existence from the BELIEF, not the other way round and HOPE is just to make BELIEF more meaningful, whatever way we follow there will always be a point where our BELIEF will merge to our HOPE and at that point we will get a new way towards TRUTH.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
I just thought...
We love Batman, We love Superman
We love Spiderman, We love Ironman
We love Hawkman, We love Aquaman
When will We learn to love Human ??
We love Spiderman, We love Ironman
We love Hawkman, We love Aquaman
When will We learn to love Human ??
Sunday, May 11, 2008
INVENTED : INFLATION EQUATION
Once again, everybody is crying out loud about inflation which is rising inversely in proportion to skirt length of Mallika Sherawat.I did a close study on this deviation previous night and have come up with a formula to calculate Inflation vs skirt length ratio.
IR = [Skirt Length of Mallika(in inches)/NP] + ^g -^s (keeping other factors constant)
Where
IR = Inflation rate
NP = No of parties involved in coalition government
^g = Rate of decrease in US aid to india
^s = Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest
Variable 1 : Skirt length of Mallika
Although looks difficult but that's a pretty simple equation which can be used in all the scenarios.Now, how I deduced that equation with the kind of intelligence i have, can be an interesting point.Inflation has risen rapidly since 2002-03 and if we take a close look at the Indian market condition at that time it is evident that it is the period when iconic Mallika sherawat entered into Indian film industry.But how mallika is related to Inflation. Here are the few factors which caused Inflation due to mallika's entrance.
1) Excessive use of Mobile phones : As her sensational performances kept on coming, people started gossiping more and more about her, hundreds and thousands of SMSes flooded during that time. she became an household name in lesser time than Nirma detergent power.People started wishing even birthdays on mallika's messages like "Ishwar kare Hardin Aapki khushiyan Petrol Ke bhav ki badhe, aur aapke gum Mallika Sherawat ke Kapdon ki tarah ghaten.". Airtel has calmed that this SMS has hit their network 15,000,00 times on Vajpayee's birthday, more than the amount she got for her first movie.She imposed a huge usage of mobile phones and pre-paid cards which market was not ready to handle it
2) Increase in sale of 'pan-bidi-chai' : Even in the small cities, the post work gathering sessions started getting longer and longer as people started discussing more and more about her mesmerizing performances in 'Murder' and sipping tea and puffing more bidi and sutta, Nathu pan wala shortly launched a PBC combo for rupees 12. Demand was so huge that PBS industry was unable to meet the requirements of their mouth watering products and all PBS walas increased their prices.
As the people started spending more and more on phones and PBS, their monthly savings decreased and they started to cut their expenditure on clothes which lead towards not so common short skirts(although claimed as a fashion but it was more due to money crunch) which further caused garment industry to smuggle more material from adjacent Bangladesh.
There are many more factors which can be i thought upon and i am convinced that main factor which lead to a sudden rise in inflation was indeed Mallika.
Variable b : Stability of Indian Government
This is again a tricky but simple point.More and more parties are involved in a coalition government, less are the chances of price to get increased for a particular thing in respective states. As our government lies on such a small stone that even a small party like Janta dal Union (which doesn't have enough funds to buy Ram Bilas Paswan a good blade) can make them sneeze so whenever finance minister tries to increase some revenues by rising prices, the party from the state consuming most part of it baffles and it has to be revoked by the government. Maharashtra and Delhi parties never allow price hike on fuel, Southern parties never allows price hike on cosmetics, Bengalis never allows price hike on Cigarettes and Bihar never let proposal of new educational institution pass.Govt has to put everything out of their pocket.The quota to a state is decided by number of MPs which are there supporting from that state.
Variable 3 : Rate of decrease in American aid to india
This factor needs no explanation as everybody knows how much independent we are, our stock markets reveals that regularly.
Variable 4 : Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest
Everyone scold Shiv sena for their rude attitude but nobody can deny that when shiv sena was in power, inflation was very much under control. Shiv sainiks used to enter every place wherever there was any sort of western activities like dancing, singing, cricket matches, award ceremonies or pravachans. They never allowed people to involve into Mallika oriented things and kept the country on the same old track for as in medieval India. Whenever they start protesting against anything, ladies stops wearing western clothes(like short skirts which as specified, is a big factor for inflation) and turn back to regular Salwar kurtas.They never allow people to get addicted to anything and keep market on track. I wonder how did Balasaheb foresaw that thing fifteen years ago. Now he wears thick glasses.
Combining all the factors an keeping them at respective places, this equation can be proved perfect, more perfect than Netwon's laws of motion.
Interesting theory, isn't it :):):)
IR = [Skirt Length of Mallika(in inches)/NP] + ^g -^s (keeping other factors constant)
Where
IR = Inflation rate
NP = No of parties involved in coalition government
^g = Rate of decrease in US aid to india
^s = Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest
Variable 1 : Skirt length of Mallika
Although looks difficult but that's a pretty simple equation which can be used in all the scenarios.Now, how I deduced that equation with the kind of intelligence i have, can be an interesting point.Inflation has risen rapidly since 2002-03 and if we take a close look at the Indian market condition at that time it is evident that it is the period when iconic Mallika sherawat entered into Indian film industry.But how mallika is related to Inflation. Here are the few factors which caused Inflation due to mallika's entrance.
1) Excessive use of Mobile phones : As her sensational performances kept on coming, people started gossiping more and more about her, hundreds and thousands of SMSes flooded during that time. she became an household name in lesser time than Nirma detergent power.People started wishing even birthdays on mallika's messages like "Ishwar kare Hardin Aapki khushiyan Petrol Ke bhav ki badhe, aur aapke gum Mallika Sherawat ke Kapdon ki tarah ghaten.". Airtel has calmed that this SMS has hit their network 15,000,00 times on Vajpayee's birthday, more than the amount she got for her first movie.She imposed a huge usage of mobile phones and pre-paid cards which market was not ready to handle it
2) Increase in sale of 'pan-bidi-chai' : Even in the small cities, the post work gathering sessions started getting longer and longer as people started discussing more and more about her mesmerizing performances in 'Murder' and sipping tea and puffing more bidi and sutta, Nathu pan wala shortly launched a PBC combo for rupees 12. Demand was so huge that PBS industry was unable to meet the requirements of their mouth watering products and all PBS walas increased their prices.
As the people started spending more and more on phones and PBS, their monthly savings decreased and they started to cut their expenditure on clothes which lead towards not so common short skirts(although claimed as a fashion but it was more due to money crunch) which further caused garment industry to smuggle more material from adjacent Bangladesh.
There are many more factors which can be i thought upon and i am convinced that main factor which lead to a sudden rise in inflation was indeed Mallika.
Variable b : Stability of Indian Government
This is again a tricky but simple point.More and more parties are involved in a coalition government, less are the chances of price to get increased for a particular thing in respective states. As our government lies on such a small stone that even a small party like Janta dal Union (which doesn't have enough funds to buy Ram Bilas Paswan a good blade) can make them sneeze so whenever finance minister tries to increase some revenues by rising prices, the party from the state consuming most part of it baffles and it has to be revoked by the government. Maharashtra and Delhi parties never allow price hike on fuel, Southern parties never allows price hike on cosmetics, Bengalis never allows price hike on Cigarettes and Bihar never let proposal of new educational institution pass.Govt has to put everything out of their pocket.The quota to a state is decided by number of MPs which are there supporting from that state.
Variable 3 : Rate of decrease in American aid to india
This factor needs no explanation as everybody knows how much independent we are, our stock markets reveals that regularly.
Variable 4 : Rate of change of Shiv sena's anti-vulgarity protest
Everyone scold Shiv sena for their rude attitude but nobody can deny that when shiv sena was in power, inflation was very much under control. Shiv sainiks used to enter every place wherever there was any sort of western activities like dancing, singing, cricket matches, award ceremonies or pravachans. They never allowed people to involve into Mallika oriented things and kept the country on the same old track for as in medieval India. Whenever they start protesting against anything, ladies stops wearing western clothes(like short skirts which as specified, is a big factor for inflation) and turn back to regular Salwar kurtas.They never allow people to get addicted to anything and keep market on track. I wonder how did Balasaheb foresaw that thing fifteen years ago. Now he wears thick glasses.
Combining all the factors an keeping them at respective places, this equation can be proved perfect, more perfect than Netwon's laws of motion.
Interesting theory, isn't it :):):)
Thursday, May 1, 2008
GRANTed - Avram - The unsung Hero
Date - April,30,2008 (Just after CL semi final against Liverpool. Chelsea won 3-2).
After their historic win against Liverpool in Champions League second leg, there will be a flood of articles praising Avram Grant all over but i think this guy deserves more than a praise at least from a critic turned fan like me.
Nobody can tell better than 'big mouth' Jose Mourinho that how it feels to manage giants like Chelsea. His 4 year tenure at Stamford Bridge saw some historic moments in the club history comprising of winning premiership title after 5 decades and that too back to back, FA cup and Carling cup. He went on to win at least one silverware every season no way its a small
achievement for a club who didn't win Premiership for 50 years. but it was not enough for a club which has brought up each and every big name into the squad from around the world. Jose's inability to qualify for Champions League final consecutive years fell upon him and he was sacked after a not so convincing start for the season 2007-08.Then there came a name from
nowhere Avram Grant.
Grant although didn't have any major achievement on his back other than helping Israel to secure third place in Euro Qualifiers, his inclusion was more debatable because he was a close Friend of Abramovich. Nobody at stamford bridge was ready to accept that including players who came out openly against Mourinho sacking. Supporters were on rampage as they wanted
somebody big as big as players and not an introvert like Avram. No wonder he started his season as badly as he could losing 2-0 to United but then he started opening his cards.
Till March end, the EPL title fight was all revolving around United and Gunners despite of Chelsea's 16 match unbeaten streak and there perfect record at Stamford Bridge, almost everybody signed them off but Avram.There was a silent wind from Chelsea
which nobody heard until it turned into a storm. The storm which has led them equal to United in the table. It is evident that title will be decided only by the very last match unless Chelsea loose its run unexpectedly.
Avram took on the Diamond ship which was already very well made by his predecessor but this ship was sinking.Avram knew it from day 1 that he is in 'No man's land' with no support from anybody else other than Abramovich and his team.The silent man
led to some dead football in the beginning which was far far and far boring than the football being played by Liverpool, United and Arsenal but they were winning...silently.Everywhere there were news that Drogba, Ballack, Lampard and Shevchenko were not happy but they were still scoring. It was like a Pheonix, re-inventing from its own ashes.
They were never called good enough to compete in Europe an in some sense critics can still prove that as they didn't have to play any big team in champions league till quarter final stages. Only team which i think was big enough to match Chelsea was Valencia which is still fighting for its relegation in La Liga. They went on for a mixed results of win and draw in group
stages but Avram had other plans for Knock out stages. They went on to kill Olympiakos, Fenerbahce and now Liverpool to the Champions League final. Something which 'Special One' like Mourinho couldn't do in three years, Avram has done it in less than a year and that too with the same team.Nobody wanted to believe in Avram and i was no different but guiding Chelsea to their first ever Champions League final and standing neck to neck in table in Premiership has silenced all his critics, i am no different.
Whatever it is but Avram has prove every worth of his by proving each and every football 'pundit' wrong out there and all i can say is that Avram Football is GRANTed.
In the end, some famous chants against Avram from Chelsea supporters.
1) Avram out! Avram out!
2) Who are ya! Who are ya!
3) Are you Jose? Are you Jose! Are you Jose in disguise!
4) Do-do-doo, lets all hire Avram, Ooo-ooo-ooo, then we might score a goal.
A critic turned fan. Hats off Avram !!
(Being a united fan, i can see Chelsea losing both Premiership and Champions league final to Red Devils but Avram has emerged as undisputed hero for me this season)
After their historic win against Liverpool in Champions League second leg, there will be a flood of articles praising Avram Grant all over but i think this guy deserves more than a praise at least from a critic turned fan like me.
Nobody can tell better than 'big mouth' Jose Mourinho that how it feels to manage giants like Chelsea. His 4 year tenure at Stamford Bridge saw some historic moments in the club history comprising of winning premiership title after 5 decades and that too back to back, FA cup and Carling cup. He went on to win at least one silverware every season no way its a small
achievement for a club who didn't win Premiership for 50 years. but it was not enough for a club which has brought up each and every big name into the squad from around the world. Jose's inability to qualify for Champions League final consecutive years fell upon him and he was sacked after a not so convincing start for the season 2007-08.Then there came a name from
nowhere Avram Grant.
Grant although didn't have any major achievement on his back other than helping Israel to secure third place in Euro Qualifiers, his inclusion was more debatable because he was a close Friend of Abramovich. Nobody at stamford bridge was ready to accept that including players who came out openly against Mourinho sacking. Supporters were on rampage as they wanted
somebody big as big as players and not an introvert like Avram. No wonder he started his season as badly as he could losing 2-0 to United but then he started opening his cards.
Till March end, the EPL title fight was all revolving around United and Gunners despite of Chelsea's 16 match unbeaten streak and there perfect record at Stamford Bridge, almost everybody signed them off but Avram.There was a silent wind from Chelsea
which nobody heard until it turned into a storm. The storm which has led them equal to United in the table. It is evident that title will be decided only by the very last match unless Chelsea loose its run unexpectedly.
Avram took on the Diamond ship which was already very well made by his predecessor but this ship was sinking.Avram knew it from day 1 that he is in 'No man's land' with no support from anybody else other than Abramovich and his team.The silent man
led to some dead football in the beginning which was far far and far boring than the football being played by Liverpool, United and Arsenal but they were winning...silently.Everywhere there were news that Drogba, Ballack, Lampard and Shevchenko were not happy but they were still scoring. It was like a Pheonix, re-inventing from its own ashes.
They were never called good enough to compete in Europe an in some sense critics can still prove that as they didn't have to play any big team in champions league till quarter final stages. Only team which i think was big enough to match Chelsea was Valencia which is still fighting for its relegation in La Liga. They went on for a mixed results of win and draw in group
stages but Avram had other plans for Knock out stages. They went on to kill Olympiakos, Fenerbahce and now Liverpool to the Champions League final. Something which 'Special One' like Mourinho couldn't do in three years, Avram has done it in less than a year and that too with the same team.Nobody wanted to believe in Avram and i was no different but guiding Chelsea to their first ever Champions League final and standing neck to neck in table in Premiership has silenced all his critics, i am no different.
Whatever it is but Avram has prove every worth of his by proving each and every football 'pundit' wrong out there and all i can say is that Avram Football is GRANTed.
In the end, some famous chants against Avram from Chelsea supporters.
1) Avram out! Avram out!
2) Who are ya! Who are ya!
3) Are you Jose? Are you Jose! Are you Jose in disguise!
4) Do-do-doo, lets all hire Avram, Ooo-ooo-ooo, then we might score a goal.
A critic turned fan. Hats off Avram !!
(Being a united fan, i can see Chelsea losing both Premiership and Champions league final to Red Devils but Avram has emerged as undisputed hero for me this season)
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